Smooth new beginnings are a nice change…
Once again I’ve been a bit quiet for awhile. Not because I didn’t have much to say, but because I wasn’t sure what parts to share and exactly how. Several weeks back, through Match.com (yes, online dating, I can hear you already, but just give it a chance here) I met someone and we went out on a hike. From the first moment I met her I had a feeling there was something different about her. Our hike ended and we decided to get a bite to eat and ended up in downtown Prescott. After several failed attempts at finding someplace that was both open, and sounded appealing, we found ourselves at Taj Mahal.
Great conversation, wonderful food, and a beautiful lady sharing it all with me, it was definitely a day that I would remember. During dinner she made a comment about “next time” and I responded (not quite with the intonation I had intended) with a query about there being a next time, she thought maybe I wasn’t sure I wanted one. Oh, how mistaken she was, inside I was thrilled of that possibility and couldn’t wait for that chance.
It turned out I didn’t have to wait that long as we got together later that week for dinner after she got off work. Once again we had a wonderful time and the conversation just flowed smoothly across quite a range of topics. We determined our parents are quite similar, though our own backgrounds are quite diverse. That has been a good thing as I think we are both learning from the other about things, some we knew we had an interest in and having someone to show us more about it is always wonderful, and other things that we had never considered for our own lives, but hearing about it now makes it interesting and something to explore together.
Through all of it, things have just felt smooth and comfortable. In the past, meeting someone new and exploring whatever might develop has always seemed to have at least some sort of hesitation. Most times (for me at least) it was something I felt, but pushed it down as simply nervousness, or trying to find the flaw in why things shouldn’t progress. Each time I would ignore those feelings (even as they continued to grow) and pursue the relationship, always with a feeling in the pit of my stomach that something wasn’t right.
It’s refreshing to not have that feeling, I don’t think I’ve started any other relationship without at least a little bit of that, even one’s I pushed for and tried to explain why it was “so right” for us to continue, knowing that quite possibly I was attempting to convince myself more than the other person. This time around I just feel comfortable, for the first time I haven’t had any of the second guessing in discussing anything with her. From topics that I would find ever excuse to not bring up with other’s in my past, with her I find myself wanting and quite often even needing to tell her now. Mostly because I am afraid if I ever held any of it back, and she found out later, maybe it would hurt our chances. Open communication and the ability to always feel confident in knowing what I have to say will be regarded as a chance to grow together instead of something negative is a nice trait to find in someone.
Nobody knows how long something will last, or where things may lead. The one thing I do know right now, is how thankful I am for everything in my past. Every choice I have ever made is the reason for me being here right now, with a possibility for something amazing. Who knows where it may lead, but what I do know is that I hope it leads to many years of learning about her, having her learn about me, and both of us growing and learning together. She’s an amazing woman, who is beautiful, smart, intelligent, and who can bring a smile to my face by a text or phone call and more often than she realizes, by the simple anticipation of seeing her again.
Moving forward, hoping this is the start of something that makes other’s jealous and maybe even envious of us.
Gerg