Events are in motion
Today was a good day, but also a difficult one. I had requested a meeting with the owners of my company so I could let them know about the events starting to happen in my life. After 15+ years with the company and being a part of the familiy atmosphere that the company is based on, I didn’t want them to hear from other people that I was considering leaving. Not to mention the way rumors get started and by the time word had gotten back to them who knows what kind of dastardly, insider trading types of things I would have been accused of. So we sat down and I told them that I am seriously looking into relocating to Arizona. I couldn’t have asked for a better response from all of them (which is one of the main reasons I have remained with this company, and also one of the toughest parts of leaving it behind.) I received their full support and best wishes in whatever it is I am trying to go after. I don’t even know what that is, but just know that I have to go look for it. The fact that they are already discussing how I can maintain a tie to the company by doing work remotely where possible, helping to train my replacement, all the way to being told that should this endeavor I am starting not work out as I hope, that I always have a place to come back to. Lots of companies wouldn’t do any of those things, but I started with them when there were less than 30 employees (there are over 100 now) and are facility was just a SMALL fraction of the size it is now. It was comforting to know that my work for them was appreciated. And the fact that I already knew it was, but hearing them actually state it, just gives one a feeling of euphoria that consequently makes decisions like the one I am currently doing that much harder to pursue.
After work I had to go pick up my 12 year old son from his mother, this is the one child I am most unsure of how we will make things work. His visits with his mother are important (I know she doesn’t think I feel that way but I do), but at the same time, as a parent, I also have to do what I think is right for the entire family. Up until this time I didn’t think a move like this would be possible with the shared households for the kids, and other factors like that. In the last few months it’s become quite apparent that it is time to change in order to improve things. Like I stated in my last post, I don’t know how this might work out, true if I were to stay then the outcome is fairly safe, I will continue to be employed, the kids can continue at their current schools, but I just feel that change is needed and now is the time to make that change.
As with any decision such as this, there are myriad reasons behind it, and affecting it. I can’t go into details of all of them yet, but over time they will each come to light in turn. Whether the reasons are valid, or even justified, is impossible to determine until much further down the road. So I just have to gather as much information as I can, use my years of experience in both family, work, and social aspects, and make a choice that I think benefits the most people. I hope I’m right, as I don’t think any parent would want to know that a decision they made affects their kids in a negative way. Because of the support of my friends and family I don’t think I could make a choice like that because they are already stepping up and offering backup alternatives should something not go as smoothly as I would hope. From offering my oldest a place to come back to California and stay should he decide he wants to finish his senior year here (as of this writing, he is all for the move as well, in spite of the fact he will be a senior this year). To people letting me know that they are there if I need someplace to turn while everything is still shaking out. Again, I already knew all these things, but just hearing people state them puts me much more at ease and confident that no matter what path I choose, the support network will always be ready to assist should it be needed.
To all my friends and family, I just want to take a moment to say thank you for your support as I struggle through trying to make sure I do this right. If it weren’t for all of you around me, I wouldn’t have felt strong enough to begin this quest in the first place. I love and appreciate all of you.
Gerg