The good… and the bad… (nothing ugly about it)

July 3rd, 2014

Life always amazes me, the way things can change so rapidly from one extreme to the other. You could be at one of your lowest points and the most off-the-wall thing may turn it all around. Or you could be riding high feeling like nothing could bring you down. That is when you are your most vulnerable, and I’ve always been a MAJOR proponent of taking those risks, putting yourself out there, whether it is for work, family, love, whatever it may be, take advantage of the moment because you never know when it might end.

But you also have to be a bit careful, I know that seems contradictory, but you have to be cognisant of everyone around you. Make sure you are not making assumptions, or making people feel taken advantage of. Be in the moment, but also be fully aware of the moment and everyone else involved. I have always been accused (and rightly so) of being overly-optimistic and speaking so absolute, even about things that are not an absolute. My thinking always has been, if you believe in something so much, and you portray that positive outlook, then positive things will happen. That doesn’t always mean what you hoped would happen does, but I do firmly believe that something good comes out of whatever you stay positive about.

On the flip side of that is when you are really down and you think nothing in the world could possibly go right for you. (Sometimes you are taken right to this point from the other). However, it may be the most random, off the wall action, sometimes by a complete stranger who has no idea of what they have done for you, that breaks you out of that feeling. Maybe you just receive some random text from someone saying they are thinking about you, or some stranger comes up and comments on your shirt, or your hair. They probably had no idea where your mind was, and how much their little comment meant to you.

I challenge everyone who reads this, the next time you are out in public, pay attention to your surroundings and find something positive to say about someone you see. You never know how it might help them with their day, then they in turn may help someone else. Maybe it even reaches someone who has come to the conclusion that there is no longer any sense in continuing on. You never know what the ripple affect of one small act of kindness might be, so create as many ripples as you can, and challenge yourself to brighten one persons day, each and every day.

That’s all I have for today. It’s been a bit of a tough week for me, but as always, I’ll come through with something good from it. I just have to stay positive. 


Communication is key

July 1st, 2014

Do you communicate well? More importantly, do people hear what you are saying properly?

For almost every aspect of life a major key is communication. If you are unable to tell people what you are thinking or feeling in a way that helps them understand you, then you are going to face struggles. The ability to get your message across, without sounding egotistical, or that you are not open to other possible interpretations, could be a major factor in whether you achieve the happiness you desire (yep, still on that kick).

It’s always important to be sure that the message you intended to convey, is actually the one that was heard. You may not realize that while you thought you were speaking clearly, completely different words or phrases were the pivot point for the listener/reader. So while it is important to be able to say what is on your mind, often even more than that, it is critical to HEAR the other party repeat back to you what your point was.

Several different times in my life I’ve discovered that the message I thought I was sending, was not what the other person was receiving. Sometimes it was even the exact opposite of what was intended. Oftentimes that can result in some bad feelings between the two parties involved.

My advice, is to speak your mind, at the moment, when it is fresh. Then, find out from the other party what message they got from your words. The critical point here, is to listen with an open mind. Don’t immediately dismiss them or their opinion. After hearing what their take on it was, review your original message with that in mind  You may discover that what you re-read seems to be a completely different story than the one you originally sent (without changing a single word). It’s all about a persons point of view on the subject matter.

After doing so, openly discuss the matter. Note that I didn’t say debate or argue, but discuss. Slowly, as you proceed through the topic, no matter how difficult or uncomfortable it may be, you will eventually both start talking the same language and discover your journey has led you to a completely different place than either of you had thought it would.

I realize this is rambling a bit, and I apologize. I hope my message got across, and if not, then tell me what message you heard and let’s discuss it.

Thanks for reading.


Que sera sera…

June 29th, 2014

A few posts back I went on a grandiose stage and declared that you had to make yourself happy in order to make those around you happy. And I whole heartedly meant (and mean) every word. But sometimes, on occasion, it is actually being around someone that makes you so happy that everyone else around you benefits as well. It’s a bit self-serving, but at the same time, if you are being true to who you are at your core, then it’s a win all around.

Life is far from simple, and things can never be without their… um… difficulties. Sometimes though you just have to use those difficult and challenging moments to help you realize the true value of what they represent. I’ve become quite a fan of a group called We The Kings, and they have a lyric in one of their songs that goes, “Without the dark the light won’t show”, every time I listen to the song that lyric jumps out at me. If we didn’t have some tough times, how could we possibly appreciate the rest of our lives?

I wrote a letter recently (and by recently I mean I JUST wrote another letter) and in it I expressed something I wanted to share here. We have no control in how a person comes into our lives, but we are in complete control of the place of importance that person holds with us. We can’t always allow the way we came to know someone affect who they are to us. We also can’t allow the views of others to influence the importance of the people we want in our lives. It can seem a bit selfish, but it also returns to the post I mentioned earlier, that if you don’t do what makes you happy first and foremost, then those around you won’t be able to share in that joy. Those who truly care about you will see the joy that fills you because of this other person, it may take them awhile to accept it, but they will know and should be happy for you.

It’s sometimes funny how there can be so many questions left in your life, but if you are on a path to happiness, then those questions become less important. Small pebbles along the path, possibly larger boulders, but they are simply causing a delay in your following the path that makes you happy, and will only stop you dead in your tracks if you allow them to.

I hope these writing mean something to some of you. I know some important ones around me are enjoying my little ramblings, and I would like to think there are some others of you out there that do as well. I’m always open to hearing some feedback, and look forward to hopefully sharing happiness I find in my life with all of you. If I can make just one other person smile, then I’d consider this blog a roaring success.